All right, I’ve been having mixed feelings about writing this review, which is coincidentally exactly the same way I feel about the movie itself. I’m talking about Scarlett Johansson’s recent action(?) film, “Lucy”.

I mean, I’m pretty sure it’s action. There was a lot of gunfire and car pileups between loopy science and squicky stuff, so we’re going with action. Why not?

We begin with the titular character and her jerk boyfriend, and I use the term loosely. I don’t think they’ve been together that long, or else Lucy might have noticed that her boyfriend was doing some less-than-legal business in his silly cowboy hat.

Don’t worry. He doesn’t stick around long. (Guh.)

While the beginning of the movie accesses some very real adult fears (the film is about a woman who is kidnapped abroad and forced to become a drug mule), it seems to shove the audience into a spiral of science fiction-y confusion pretty quickly.

Don’t get me wrong.

I really enjoyed the first part of the movie.

The increased brain function Lucy receives through her misadventure is, at first, the source of some real insight into human feeling and a little bit of humor. I loved watching her break down and diagnose her roommate’s medical conditions with a helpful little fact sheet.

I enjoyed that first suggestion of an increased capability of interacting with the world.

…But then it got creepy.

Soon after achieving higher percentages of brain function, Lucy becomes superhuman in an eerie way, seemingly beyond human emotion. After that, it was pretty much an hour or so (?) of watching Johansson kick butt and break things in monotone.

And then we get to the dissolving and evolving weirdness, with a nice dash of the space time continuum and a handy dandy flash-drive. I was confused. I didn’t know if I enjoyed it.

I’m still not sure if I enjoyed it.

The ending felt like “2001: A Space Odyssey” crossed with the closing narration from X-Men United and American Beauty. It indicates that “Life was given to us a billion years ago. Now you know what to do with it.”

No, I don’t!

I don’t want to be kidnapped and have wacked-up pregnancy chemicals sewn into my stomach, I don’t want to rapidly lose touch with humanity. I don’t want to kill a bunch of people and go on an automotive rampage on the streets of France, and I definitely don’t want to do whatever it is she did at the end when she somehow became Hal.




I’ll be honest here.

It was…entertaining to watch? It was something I didn’t mind spending the money to see, but I would only rewatch it to see the reaction of whoever I saw it with.

Scarlett Johansson did a great job with a frankly unsettling script, and for that I’ll give “Lucy” one extra point.